TRUMP: So sick of the “Putin puppet” comments.
PENCE: Understood sir.
TRUMP: Not true. Couldn’t live with myself if I did. No man should be a puppet of a sociopath.
PENCE: I couldn’t agree more sir.
TRUMP: How can you look in the mirror every morning and say “I work for an egotistical megalomaniac?”
PENCE: I literally have no idea sir.
TRUMP: No soul. Would just kill myself if I had to take orders from someone like that.
PENCE: Oh. Right. The Red Phone sir.
TRUMP: ‘sup Vlad?
PUTIN: Sekretariat of your Styate. Yoo weel peek Rex. Ees good choice.
TRUMP: Done. Up for League of Legends tonight?
PUTIN: Bee there or bee Red Square. Vlad out.
TRUMP: Anyway, no puppet no peace. Awful, not having backbone. Would slowly rot inside dealing with someone like that.
PENCE: I have to go sir. It’s time for my medication.
TRUMP: Meds? What meds?
PENCE: All of them.