PENCE: Sir, did you watch the Oscars last night?
TRUMP: Boring. Waste of time. One thing I don’t want to see is a bunch of people slapping themselves on the back bragging about how great they are.
TRUMP: The irony. It’s killing you isn’t it?
PENCE: Yes sir. Thank you sir. But good news!
TRUMP: I’m finally on the 50? Grant. Loser. Good general. Couldn’t Presidentize. Multitask!
PENCE: No, that’s…not it.
TRUMP: Mexico’s paying for the wall? Tired of having to remind them. Memory!
PENCE: Not yet sir.
TRUMP: Foghat is dropping a new album?
PENCE: …no. It’s the Oscars. According to the Meryl Streep Political Grandstanding Scale, the number of speeches disparaging you was WAY down. You hit only a 4.2 Streeps!
TRUMP: Who’s Meryl Streep?
PENCE: You’re kidding.
TRUMP: I don’t kid. Even with my kids. Need to teach them about business from an early age. Mini-mes!
PENCE: She’s an…actress.
TRUMP: Uggghhhh. Bet she thinks she knows more about how to do other people’s jobs than her own. Probably would have no idea what to do if she had to switch careers. Ignorant!
TRUMP: The irony is killing you again, isn’t it?
PENCE: Yes sir. Thank you sir.