4/3/2017 – Scalptacular

TRUMP: Ok. Crisis mode now. Got to concentrate. Focus!

PENCE: Sir I just heard about the terrorist attack in Russia. We should prepare a statement. 

TRUMP: Poots already did that for me. Just spoke to him on my personal phone. 

PENCE: So what crisis are you-

TRUMP: The Trial of the Hair Master begins today. 

PENCE: The Senate Panel vote for Gorsuch?

TRUMP: -Hair Master Gorsuch-

PENCE: *sigh* Hair Master Gorsuch?

TRUMP: It’s a monumental event today. 

PENCE: Of course, Mr. President. If the Democrats do filibuster in an attempt to block the vote it would be an extremely rare yet still dramatic departure from Senate standards of bipartisanship and collegiality.

TRUMP: Not that, he’s switching conditioners. Why now? What’s his angle? He’s already scalptacular. Hairfection!

PENCE: WHY ARE YOU OBSESSED WITH HIS HAIR???!???

TRUMP:

PENCE:

TRUMP:

PENCE: Oh. Ohhhhhhhh! Right. 

TRUMP: Keep me up to date. I need to know if anything changes. 

PENCE: As soon as they go to vote I’ll-

TRUMP:

PENCE: …let you know what conditioner he’s using. 

TRUMP: Check on detanglers too. We need to get that to the labs. I suspect ghee and cocoa butter. Natural!

PENCE: Will do *sigh*

TRUMP: Also keep an eye on that Russia thing, whatever it was. Might be important. 

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