5/11/2017 – Bobamir Americanmanski

PENCE: Mr. President, now that former FBI Director Comey has been um, asked to complete an involuntary career transition…

TRUMP: Just say fired, Pence. You. Walking on eggshells. Explains your white top.

PENCE: Understood sir. With the, um, firing, we need to hire a new director for the bureau.

TRUMP: You do it.

PENCE: I don’t believe that’s allowed sir. Conflict of interest.

TRUMP: Pfeh. Only conflict is you’d have to actually do something other than just standing there like a transitioning albino.

PENCE: I’ve prepared a list of-

TRUMP: Spicer you…where’d he go?

SPICER: Um, over here sir.

TRUMP: You. Spicer. Why are you hiding behind the fern?

SPICER: Just…checking for loose change. Sir.

TRUMP: Change. Good investment. Small units build up to big presence. Like my Tweet page. Incremental power!

PENCE: Mr. President, I believe you have to consider someone new.

DeVOS: I coold dew it Mistre Persidunt! As Sekretery of Edyoosashun I allredy impproved the Deepartmint!



DeVOS: Sereeusly!


PENCE: Maybe someone not in the room, sir? 

TRUMP: There has to be a guy that…hold up. Phone. You. Phone guy. Speak. 

CHRISTIE: Heya Donald, I mean Mr. President, hows everything goin’? Hey, I heard through the grapevine that you might be looking for-

TRUMP: *click* There has to be a guy that…hold up. Phone. You. Phone Guy. Speak. 

GIULIANI: NEW YAWK. DA YANKEES. 911911911911911911

TRUMP: *click* There has to be a guy that can do this job. Hold up. You. Phone Guy. Speak. 

PUTIN: Hyello. This is…Bob..amir…..Americanman…ski.

TRUMP: Bobamir Americanmanski. Never heard of you. 

AMERICANMANSKI: Eeees good to-*COUGH*-I mean eet…it is…good to be talking to best quality Trump. 

TRUMP: You. Elevator pitch. Go.

AMERICANMANSKI: FBI means Fire Bad Individuals. Like the Heellary Cleen-*COUGH*- Hillary Clinton. Gets in way of the Trump plans.

TRUMP: You’re hired. Send resume. One thing. Work on that cough. Can’t have FBI director who can’t track down source of his throat problems. Investigative lozenges!   

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