BANNON: Congratulations on your CNN victory sir!
PENCE: Amazing!
TRUMP: CNN. Worst fake news agency ever. Should stand for Creates New News or Confused Nitwit Newsmen or Crazy Nancyboys Network
BANNON:
PENCE:
TRUMP: Those are jokes.
BANNON: Ah.
PENCE: Hmm.
TRUMP: Good ones.
BANNON: Ha!
PENCE: HA!
TRUMP: Ugh. Pence. Have to even out fake laugh everyone. Just deplorable. But not like the good ones in the basket. Classic definition!
PENCE: Well sir, you must be quite happy with how events are unfolding!
BANNON: Indeed. Three CNN executives are resigning after the network acknowledged they fabricated your Russian ties for ratings!
TRUMP: Horrible lies. No evidence. Fabricated fiction!
PUTIN: Hyello.
TRUMP: Hey Poots. Same time next week?
PUTIN: Eees agreeable.
BANNON: Um-
PENCE: Uh-
TRUMP: What?
PUTIN: Eees ok. I undyerstand. Putin. So manly. Can be deestracting.
BANNON: Um, Mr. President, not to pry but-
PENCE: Why is President Putin here?
BANNON: And, might I add, shirtless?
TRUMP: Need to know basis.
PUTIN: Eees classeefyed.
ORB: SAME TIME NEXT WEEK COVFEFE. YOU TOO PUTINFEFE.
TRUMP: Can’t wait. Boom.
PUTIN: Be there or be Red Square. Proschay.
BANNON: We have to get him the hell out of here!
PENCE: If the press-
TRUMP: No need to worry about fake news folks. Lied about my ties to Putin, will lie about this too. Untruthitude!
BANNON: Mr. President, at some point we are going to have to sit down and discuss what you consider a tie.
PUTIN: Thyere ees no need for cloak and the dagger. At leeest not today. I weeel tyake seekret tonnil to underground shuttle.
TRUMP: Second bookshelf on the right.
PENCE: I have so much going on in my head right now.
TRUMP: And none involving melanin.
PUTIN: Yowch. Seek burn. Worse than my firebombing of Georgian rebel veellages.
TRUMP: Didn’t know Atlanta was on fire again.
PUTIN: Not that Georgia. Ok, time to go.
BANNON: President Putin, you forgot your shirt.
PUTIN: Deed not. Proschay.
PENCE: And there he goes.
BANNON: A secret bookshelf escape tunnel. That’s kind of new.
TRUMP: Ok. You two. Out. Need time to tweetgloat. Laugh at CNN for getting caught newsfaking. If there’s one thing I can’t stand it’s someone who lies and tells stories just for ratings, increased publicity, and the chance to take a cheap shot at an enemy!
PENCE:
BANNON:
TRUMP:
PENCE:
BANNON:
TRUMP: One word and I phone Putin and introduce him to our two new ambassadors to Siberia. Lifetime post!
PENCE: Leaving!
BANNON: Things to do!
