12/4/2017 – Vermin

PENCE: Mr. President, I understand your general dissatisfaction with the FBI, but do you think it was worthwhile to call them out on Twitter. 

TRUMP: FBI. Who cares. Stands for fumbling bumbling idiots. Can’t hear a word I say!

FBI: *Ah-choo!*

TRUMP: Trump bless you. 

PENCE: That…wasn’t me sir. 

TRUMP: Who was that. 

PUTIN: Dat was Eff bee eye. Eees comical. 

TRUMP: Who said that? 

PENCE: It wasn’t me!

FBI: Me neither. 

PUTIN: Can proove nothing. 

CIA: Didn’t say anything.


TRUMP: Ok. Had enough. All you voices. Can’t see but can hear. Trump ears believe me. Hears everything. People saying “Trump is amazing” and “Trump is the best ever”. So True. Just the best. Peerless!

PENCE: Yes sir, no one can truly compare to you.

FBI: True

CIA: Accurate

PUTIN: Eees true. 


TRUMP: OK. Last time. Voices. Put names to them. Identify. Go. 

FBI: We’re….the…

CIA: Roaches. Just us roaches. 

PUTIN: Yes. The Vite Howse. Eeees crawleeng vith bugs!


TRUMP: That’s better. Can deal. Don’t mind bugs listening in to what I say. 

PENCE: Clearly. 

TRUMP: But all you. Have to go. If there’s one thing we can’t have around here is disgusting vermin infesting the White House. No place! 






TRUMP: What? 

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